Trouble in Paradise???

Did the subject line get you interested? If you are a parent, did you fear this was about your daughter? Were you eager to hear the "bad" news?

Oops. I lied. I just wanted to grab your attention. There is no trouble here--only opportunities for growth. For certain there are lessons to be learned, but I don't view those as trouble.

We might have a few instances where players "forget" to go to class or struggle with turning in their assignments on time. In these instances, we gently prod them to do what is right. By gentle prodding, I mean making their teammates run more on conditioning days or maybe even kicking them out of practice until they come to the awareness school is important. (You might be wondering if this is gentle what the hard stuff is, but I'll save that for another blog.)

Last week we had a player who temporarily lost her notebook and didn't have her journal answers prepared on time. She bargained with me to not make the team run because of her failure. When she offered to run 10 suicides if I wouldn't make the team run additional sprints, I agreed. I'm not certain she was happy I so quickly agreed with her offer, and I don't know if she learned not to lose her notebook or if her lesson included never offering to run 10 suicides for her teammates. I'd prefer she learned not to lose her notebook.

My view is every day is an opportunity for the players to get better and to discover something about themselves. I don't believe there are mistakes. Mistakes are chances to get better, to expand, to listen and to learn. So when a player comes to me who has experienced a mistake, I want to know what they have learned. It does not mean they are free from consequences for their actions, but I am interested if they have grown to a new level.

We had some players who made poor decisions over the weekend. Since it was over the weekend, you might be able to guess what those decisions involved. I can remember when I was a student-athlete and had a few poor decision-making weekends. Fortunately, I paid for them which made me learn how to make better choices. I am hoping that the 30 minute butt-breaking workout I put them through on Tuesday will enlighten them. If not, the next lesson will be tougher.

Some people learn lessons slower than others. For those people the consequences become tougher each time. The important thing I want them to learn is to admit their mistakes, be willing to grow from them, and finally to forgive themselves. After suffering a consequence the continual beating up of self serves no purpose. Forgiveness allows them to go forward with confidence and clarity.

Is there trouble in paradise? Never. There is only opportunity.

ONE HEART. ONE DREAM.